Saturday, February 25, 2017

Underrated Horror Gems--"Alligator"

     "Alligator" was a movie released in 1980.  It received mixed reviews from critics, and did okay, but not great at the box office (it reportedly made about 6.5 million dollars versus a 1.5 million dollar budget).  I think it's safe to say it's considered a cult film.  (There was a sequel, in 1991, but this one was very poorly regarded.)  Obviously, I enjoy it, and want to discuss it further.
     I'll start with a brief synopsis.  Human body parts are being discovered in the sewage treatment plant in an unnamed Missouri city.  Detective David Madison investigates, and finds a possible link to the local Slade Pharmaceutical company.  Visits to the sewer itself cause further deaths, and proof that the culprit is indeed a giant alligator.  Efforts to corner and kill it result in it rampaging throughout the city.  A noted big game hunter is brought in to combat the beast.  A herpetologist who specializes in snakes and alligators, Dr. Marisa Kendall, also assists Madison.  Can anyone stop the 30 foot long, ravenous monster?
     (SPOILERS AHEAD UNTIL NOTED)  Now I'll include a more detailed, spoiler-rich recap.  The film opens in Florida, at a gator farm.  A young girl buys a pet baby alligator, and brings it home to Missouri.  Her father, though, quickly flies in a rage and flushes it down the toilet.  We then cut to 12 years later, to 1980.  A pet store owner, Gutchel, is grabbing stray dogs and cats (and even some that are missing, owned pets) off the streets and selling them to Slade Pharmaceutical.  There Dr. Hill is conducting illegal, secret experiments on these animals using synthetic hormones, some of which result in extreme growth and raised appetite.  Gutchel is killed by the giant gator in the sewer, while he's dumping some of the illegal experiment test animals' corpses.  Detective Madison's investigation leads him to question the personnel at Slade, and to check out the sewer.  Unfortunately, during this sewer visit Madison watches in horror as a young policeman, Kelly, is fatally attached by the alligator.  Madison is traumatized, even more so because he still harbors guilt about a partner killed with Madison's gun five years before.  Madison and his boss, Chief Clark, meet herpetologist Dr. Marisa Kendall, who's skeptical about his claims.  However, a nasty reporter, Kemp, is slain by the alligator while visiting the sewer, and the film from his recovered camera proves the existence of an immense alligator.  Dozens of well armed police and a SWAT team converge in the sewer, hoping to drive the animal toward an ambush point.  Instead, though, the gator bursts out through the street, attacks a policeman, and then disappears.  The city hires Colonel Brock, a famous big game hunter, and Madison is told to stay out of his way.  Kendall and Madison poke around more at Slade Pharmaceutical, and learn more about their experiments.  In retaliation, the well-connected Slade has Madison fired.  The gator eats a little kid in a swimming pool, and then manages to kill Brock in a confrontation in an alley.  Some police in speedboats engage the alligator in a river, but the end result is a crashed boat, at least one dead policeman, and little to no damage to the animal.  The gator ends up at Slade's mansion while he's hosting an outdoor pre-wedding party for Dr. Hill and Slade's daughter.  The gator kills several people, including the corrupt mayor and Slade (possibly Dr. Hill, too--I couldn't tell).  Madison and Dr. Kendall give chase, and realize the beast will return to its home area in the sewer.  Madison sets a trap using a stolen timer and dynamite.  He narrowly escapes the blast zone via a manhole, as the behemoth is blown to pieces.  But during the last scene we see another baby gator entering the sewer from a toilet flush.
     "Alligator" is part of the "nature run amok" subgenre.  And like many movies since 1975, it's clearly heavily influenced by the blockbuster "Jaws."  There are many similarities between the two.  Both are about a real, dangerous animal that has attained a huge size (although "Alligator's" titular beast is much more exaggerated and unrealistic than the shark in "Jaws").  In both, a cop is leading the investigation, and he's initially not believed.  The attacker is seen only briefly, and quickly, for the first half or so of the movies.  Both films' mayors are ineffectual, interfering, and downright corrupt (even more so in the "Jaws" novel).  The lead character is fired for "pushing too far," in both movies (well, Sheriff Brody wasn't fired until "Jaws 2," but you get what I mean).  "Jaws's" Quint and "Alligator's" Colonel Brock are two peas in a pod--both are experienced hunters, but are also arrogant and apparently saddled with serious drinking problems.  The endings of both films are similar, with the monster being blown up.
     So why do I like this ripoff of a movie so much?  Probably because it's competently done.  Director Lewis Teague does a good job of moving the story along at a good pace, and providing some very tense and disturbing moments.  The cast is good for a low budget horror flick.  Robert Forster is very good as Detective Madison--very flawed, but likable (more on this character later).  His co-star, Robin Riker is similarly appealing as the somewhat nerdy Dr. Kendall, and their romance seems natural, and not "tacked on" as is so often in movies of this type.  Michael Gazzo is appropriately blustery as Chief Clark, and Dean Jagger is a believable scumbag pharmaceutical company owner, kind of an old, bald, version of Martin Shkreli.  Henry Silva's Col. Brock is fun, too.  The smaller roles are also done well, I thought, especially given the movie's budget.  The running joke about Madison's receding hairline (which Robert Forster actually added) is an amusing, humanizing touch to his character.
     In a movie like this, one of the major issues is, how are the special effects?  Clearly, this was long before CGI, so how do the effects hold up?  Surprisingly well.  As I mentioned, the movie wisely uses the "less is more" approach for much of the movie, showing only quick glimpses of the gator, and even some from its point of view.  Basically, four methods were used.  There was a full size, complete animatronic alligator body, which required two strong guys to operate, and it didn't work that well.  The second method was an animatronic alligator head mounted on wheels.  The third was a disembodied tail on a rig, for the tail swatting scenes.  And lastly, they used real, young gators walking around on miniature sets as well.  There are a few dodgy moments (most notably, when the mayor is being attacked the gator head looks pretty fake), but overall the alligator seems real. I'm sure my bias against much of modern CGI is already well known, but suffice it to say, I think the primitive, practical effects of "Alligator" were very effective, and even superior to some modern CGI.
     Moving to the movie's themes, I think the most obvious one is the controversy about laboratory testing on animals.  And the scientist side doesn't come off very well.  Dr. Hill is very unethical, as he buys stolen animals, cruelly cut their larynxes so they can't make much noise, conducts illegal experiments, hidden from the Humane Society, and then just has Gutchel dispose of the bodies, knowing their dumping isn't legit.  Similarly, his boss, Slade, is ridiculously evil--it's not hard to imagine that he'll do anything to get his drugs approved by the FDA, and to make the most profit he can.  Corruption seems to be his middle name, as he has the mayor, and presumably other politicians, in his back pocket.
     On a similar note, there's the old theme about humans damaging their environment, and how nature responds, or even takes revenge.  The alligator is so giant, and hungry, because it's been eating the synthetic hormones made by Slade in the animal testing corpses that Gutchel keeps dumping in its home.  His careless body disposal is clearly affecting the environment.  In reality, agricultural chemical runoff, and improperly disposed medicines have obviously negatively impacted the environment.  (One example is "The Pill" has apparently taken a  huge toll on various species of fish.)  That's one of the fun, satisfying parts of the film, when the gator kills the real villain, Slade, and the mayor, and maybe Dr. Hill.  And how the alligator made it into the sewer in the first place is yet another ecological point, one based, again, in reality.  It's crazy to think that it used to be legal, and somewhat common, in the U.S. to sell baby alligators as pets to the general public, even through the mail.  (Now most states prohibit this, or at least severely limit this practice, but black market internet sales are still depressingly prevalent.)  How could this possibly end well?  Either the poor gator would quickly die when small, or it would grow up enough to be dangerous--what ordinary household could take care of an 8-14 foot alligator, that can potentially live for 80 year?!  Alligators were once seriously endangered in the U.S., and only recovered once humans stopped over-hunting them, and destroying their home ranges, etc.
     The character of David Madison is a very different, and interesting take on the typical male film hero, too.  Obviously most movie cops are tough and decisive--confident, good with their fists and guns.  If anything, they might be too aggressive, and reigned in by bureaucratic red tape when they're trying to solve crimes "their way."  Madison seems to be the antithesis of this.  He's not incompetent--he's a detective, and seems reasonably well respected at work.  But, he's clearly suffering from extreme guilt, PTSD possibly, from losing his partner five years before.  We learn that a crook tricked him by holding a roll of pennies to his head--Madison thought it was a gun, and relinquished his own firearm.  The crook then shot his partner dead.  Madison reveals that he "just froze" at the most important moment of the encounter.  When Kelly is grabbed by the gator, and killed, Madison also reacts in a decidedly non-action hero sort of way.  He burst out of the manhole, yelling about an alligator, and then blacks out, waking up later in a hospital bed.  Screenwriter Sayles stated he intended this idea, and it's clear to see.  The alligator is a metaphor for Madison's personal demons.  He needs to find his courage, and actually conquer his fears.  Even his embarrassment about his receding hairline seems odd for a "hero cop"--would Dirty Harry be embarrassed about his appearance?  But, in this case, these details, to my mind, make Madison a more realistic, and relateable character.  He's neurotic, he experiences guilt, and doubt--he's one of us.
    A few other minor moments struck me as well.  Col. Brock is a bit casually racist, as he refers to his hired African American helpers as "native bearers," and the leader of them as a "local chieftain."  He's also creepily hitting on every women he meets, too, so a class act across the board.  I doubt many viewers mourn his character's passing.  There's also the part when the police photographer hands Madison and Clark the photos taken by Kemp, showing the giant alligator attacking him.  He says, "Imagine clicking away with your camera while that's coming at you."  Kind of an in-joke, something that probably every viewer has said while watching a typical "found footage" horror movie.  Kemp, of course, is shown to be nasty and sleazy in general, as he harps on Madison losing hie former partner, in an incident that was tragic, but an understandable mistake.  He also badgers nurses to reveal personal details about Madison's condition, and manipulates the objects in the sewer to make a better picture.  In the media vs. police confrontation that often takes place, in movies and in real life, this movie's most prominent Fourth Estater is frankly detestable.  We also don't feel very sorry when he's eaten by the alligator.
     (END SPOILERS--SAFE FOR EVERYONE)  Now I'll address another obvious question that "Alligator" watchers probably have.  Sure, a 30 foot long specimen is fiction, but have alligators been found living in sewers?  It's an old story, as rumors about this date back to at least the late 1920's/early 1930's.  The story got a boost from Robert Daley's 1959 book, "The World Beneath the City," about the New York City underground.  In it, he quotes a former New York City Commissioner of Sewers, Teddy May, as confirming that there were indeed alligators, usually albino, found in the Big Apple's core.  Well, May was probably telling a jokey story, or was mistaken.  As Dr. Kendall mentions in the movie, alligators can't live in sewers, especially in Northern climates like New York.  They're too polluted for one.  Also, the lack of sunlight would result in the animals' bones not hardening properly.  And then there's the cold.  NYC's winters would be way too much for a tropical animal--among other things, they can't digest food in the cold temperatures.  The urban myth is also likely based on a single incident from 1935.  Some kids found an 8 foot alligator in an East Harlem sewer.  It's believed to have swam up the Harlem River after falling off a steamship.  Whatever the source, it clearly wasn't in the sewer long, and didn't grow up there.  Thomas Pynchon's reference to the "sewer gators"story in his 1963 novel "V" may have further propagated the myth.  Periodically alligators have been found in sewers in Southern U.S. cities, but again, obviously this was temporary--these animals would always vastly prefer their natural environment for a home.
     As I mentioned, this little independent monster flick ended up with a surprisingly talented cast and crew.  Star Robert Forster has had a long movie career.  Highlights include "Medium Cool" (1969), "The Black Hole" (1979), "The Delta Force" (1986), "Jackie Brown" (1997), (for which he was Oscar-nominated), "Mulholland Drive" (2001), and "The Descendants" (2011).  Dr. Marisa Kendall portrayer Robin Riker has kept busy, mostly on television--"Get a Life" (1990-2), "The Bold and the Beautiful" (2008-10), and guest roles on "NCIS," "Cold Case," and "Bones."  Michael Gazzo (Chief Clark) was in "On the Waterfront" (1954), "Black Sunday" (1974), "Sudden Impact" (1983), and "Last Action Hero" (1993) before his death in 1995.  He's best known for being a playwright and for appearing in an Oscar-nominated role as Frank Pentangeli in "The Godfather II" (1974).  Dean Jagger (Slade) also had a long and distinguished career before his death in 1991.  Among others, he was in "Revolt of the Zombies" (1936), "Twelve O'clock High" (1949) (for which he won an Academy Award), "The Robe" (1953), "Vanishing Point" (1971) and "Game of Death" (1978).  Luke Gutchel portrayer Sydney Lassick is most known for "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest" (1975), "History of the World Part 1" (1981), and "Shakes the Clown" (1992).  Slimy Colonel Brock was played by Henry Silva, best known for "The Manchurian Candidate" (1962), "Buck Rogers in the 25th Century" (1979), "Chained Heat" (1983) and "Ocean's Eleven" (2001).  "Lolita" (1962) star Sue Lyon had a brief role in "Alligator" as a television news reporter.  Stuntman/actor Kane Hodder, best known for playing killer Jason Voorhees several times in the "Friday the 13th" movie series, got an early role playing the alligator, stuffed into the full size animatronic body.  Finally, actor Bryan Cranston, best known for being Walter White in the television series "Breaking Bad," as well as appearing several times on "Seinfeld," and in movies such as "Saving Private Ryan" (1998), "Little Miss Sunshine" (2006), "Argo" (2012), and "Godzilla" (2014) had a very early, tiny part on the "Alligator" production crew.  As he put it in his book, he was the special effect's assistant's assistant's assistant, in charge of the alligator's guts.  Director Lewis Teague went on to helm movies like "Cujo" (1983), "Cat's Eye" (1985), and "Navy Seals" (1990).  Writer John Sayles worked on the screenplays for "Piranha" (1979), "The Howling" (1981), and "Apollo 13" (1996), as well as writing and directing "Return of the Secaucus Seven" (1980), "Matewan" (1987), "Passion Fish" (1992) (nominated for an Oscar), "Lone Star" (1996) (also Oscar-nominated), and "Go for Sisters" (2013).  Additionally, while set in the American Midwest, the movie was filmed in Southern California, mostly around Los Angeles and Pasadena.  Many of the sewer scenes were shot in the Los Angeles River, which has been used in many films, including "Them" (1954), "It's Alive" (1974), "Chinatown" (1974), the racing scene from "Grease" (1978), the great motorcycle/truck chase scene from "Terminator 2" (1991), and television's "Fear the Walking Dead."
     Therefore, in closing, "Alligator" was a fun, intense movie, and I think it still holds up.  Fans of nature run amok movies should give it a look.

Saturday, February 18, 2017

Exotic/Disgusting Foods and Beverages Forum--Japanese Company Snacks Made in Thailand, and Brief Writing News

     I realize the title of this post is a little clunky, but that's the situation here.  I hurriedly grabbed two bags of snacks that both read, "Product of Thailand."  However, when I looked up the products online, I learned that the manufacturing companies was actually Japanese.  The two snacks I tried were Shirakiku nori make arare (or rice crackers with seaweed) and Calbee baked shrimp chips.
     Both companies had almost ridiculously detailed websites.  Shirakiku is actually a private brand of products made by Wismettac Asian Foods, Inc.  The company, which has had some name changes, was founded in 1912.  They produce a whole host of food items--frozen seafood, ramen, fruits and vegetables, and both alcoholic and non-alcoholic beverages.  Also some non-edible food products, like chopsticks, bento boxes, and sushi trays.  This Kobe, Japan based company boasted sales of 1.2 billion in 2015, and employs over 1200 people worldwide.  Additionally, their Frequently Asked Questions section on the website answers the query, "Is it safe to eat products from Japan after a nuclear power plant accident?"  (The short answer is apparently "yes," as government agencies from Japan, the U.S., and Canada inspect and clear their food products.)
     Calbee is a slightly newer company, dating back to 1949.  This company specializes in potato-based snacks, other veggie snacks, and granola-type cereals.  Among other things, their website mentions that they have an impressive 99.9% recycling rate.  Also that they employ 3728 employees (as of February 17, 2017 I guess--I can't believe how exact they are!)  Calbee also received awards in 2014 and 2016 for being proactive about promoting female employees and staff.  As for marketing, Calbee both sponsors a car racing team and  the Tiger and Bunny anime.  Finally, they currently are owned by 25,730 shareholders.  (Sorry, I know the average reader almost certainly doesn't care about this, but I'm amused by the precise statistics on their public website.)
     As it turns out, I had the seaweed rice crackers before, years ago, although it might have been a different company's version.  Shirakiku's crackers were small, yellowish-brown rods that were wrapped in seaweed.  Texture-wise, they were very crunchy.  The taste was very good.  Since I'm a fan of seaweed in general (see December 12, 2013 post for more information) it's not too surprising that I liked a rice cracker wrapped in it.  Quite a respectable snack.  I can heartily recommend the Shirakiku nori make arare.
    The Calbee shrimp chips were also rod shaped, with ribs on them.  Their yellow chips were about 2 inches (about 5 cm.) long.  They're made from wheat flour, palm oil, shrimp, corn and tapioca starches, sugar, salt, and leavening (which contains various chemicals, including the dreaded-by-some MSG).  Like the seaweed crackers they were crunchy.  And once again, they were quite tasty.  Their shrimp flavor was detectable, but not too overpowering.  I enjoyed these a lot, and will definitely buy them again when I get the chance (both of these snacks came from a Wegman's supermarket).
     Overall, then, it was a good week's haul--both snacks were clearly worth it.
     Switching tracks, I recently got an acceptance from a horror magazine called DeadLights.  It's for a non-fiction piece.  We should start editing very soon, and the issue is due out this April.  More details to follow.

Saturday, February 11, 2017

Exotic/Disgusting Foods and Beverages Forum--Polish Juice Drinks

     A nearby Wegman's grocery in Southeast Pennsylvania paid off again.  Among other treasures, their foreign food aisle yielded up a couple of Polish juice (soft) drinks.  I quickly snapped them up.
     Normally this is the paragraph where I would give a brief background about the company that made the products I was trying.  Alas, I can't really do this in a very detailed way today.  I looked up the company in question, Vavel, and couldn't find much.  A few other products, but that's about it.  So, in addition to fruit drinks, Vavel makes a variety of jams, marinated vegetables, pickles, sauerkraut, and at least one kind of cream fudge.  As for the juice drinks, other than the two I tried, the carrot and black currant flavors, they also make tomato and cherry versions.
     Carrots are one of the older vegetables that people have domesticated and cultivated.  They are believed to have first been grown in Iran and Afghanistan by at least 5000 years ago.  Their original colors were red, yellow, and purple, with the now common orange kind being a relatively recent development, about 400 years old.  They're probably most renowned for being an excellent source of the nutrient beta-carotene, which actually gets part of its name from carrots.  However, one claim about carrot's health benefits is now known to be false.  During World War II, English Royal Air Force pilots and crew seemed to be doing unusually well during air fights at night.  The reason for this was said to be their diet heavy on carrots.  Which, it turns out, is a wild exaggeration.  Vitamin A (which is also present in carrots) does help a person's vision if their diet is deficient, but it won't make a normal person see almost supernaturally well at night.  The RAF's real secret was that they'd developed radar, but didn't want to admit this, for obvious reasons.  Also, if a person eats huge amounts of carrots (or other beta-carotene rich foods) their skin may turn orange.  It's called, carotenodermy, and is usually harmless, although surely off-putting to witnesses.
     Black currant is a plant, and correspondingly, an edible berry of this plant.  They are thought to have first been cultivated in the 11th century, in Russia.  Now they can be found across Northern and Central Europe and Asia.  Raising them was actually banned in the U.S. in the early 1900's, because they're a vector for a type of fungus that harmed the American logging industry.  The federal ban was lifted in 1966.  Since then, some states have legalized it again.  The berries themselves are considered to have a very strong and tart taste.  As such, they're usually not eaten raw, but are made into juice additives, jams, sauces, or dessert additives to things like cheesecake, yogurts, and ice cream.  The British sometimes use them in a couple of beer cocktails (see August 31, 2014 post for more information on these).  A lager 'n' black is black currant juice mixed into that type of beer, and a "black 'n' black" is the juice in a stout.
     Also, on a personal note, if I haven't already made it clear in past posts, I despise carrots.  Along with hot beverages, soups, and lima beans, I hate carrots with every cell of my body.  It drives me crazy when salads or entrees have carrot shavings scattered within them.  I'm sure I've embarrassed many dining companions at restaurants when I painstakingly try to remove every last carrot shred.  But, I was willing to "take one for the team," so to speak, for the purposes of this post.
     On that note, let's get to the drinks.  Each bottle was a robust 750 milliliters, or 25.36 ounces.  The carrot drink was made with 35% juice, while the other one was made up of 25% black currant juice.  Each was fairly high in calories--the carrot kind was 270 calories for the entire bottle, and the black currant one was 390.  The carrot drink was orange in color, of course, and had an unpleasant odor.  The taste was a bit sweeter than a regular carrot, presumably due to the presence of sugar and fructose/glucose syrup in it.  But I thought it was pretty bad.  I did manage to choke down 8 ounces of it, so it was barely drinkable.  In damning it with faint praise, it was not literally vomit-inducing, as I feared.  On the other hand, I won't have this one again, unless someone's life literally depends on it.  (And I'd probably still have to think long and hard about it.)  Fortunately, the black currant one was much better.  It was purple, and didn't have much of a smell either way.  It was tart, as advertised, but still pretty good.  I'm guessing the added sweeteners cut the black currant's tartness enough.  So, for this category there were no surprises.  I hated the carrot one, and enjoyed the black currant one.
     Finally, to throw out some food/beverage trivia, I learned that vodka is thought to have been invented in Poland, sometime in the 8th century.  And, more definitively, bagels also hail from Poland originally.  Jewish communities there created them in the early 1600's or so.


Saturday, February 4, 2017

Exotic/Disgusting Foods and Beverages Forum--Pepino Melons

     First off, the name is a little strange.  "Pepino" is Spanish for "cucumber."  Although some claim the flavor of this fruit is cucumber-like, they're not related to cucumbers.  They are sometimes called pepino dulce ("sweet cucumber" in Spanish) to differentiate them from regular cucumbers.  Then there's the second part of the name.  While they look somewhat like small melons, kind of, and are thought to taste like some varieties, they're only very distantly related to them.  Pepinos are actually part of the nightshade family, so they're closely related to tomatoes and eggplant.  Confused yet?  So am I.
     Moving on, the pepino is native to the Andes region, in Chile, Peru, and Columbia.  As such, they're commonly eaten in these countries, along with Ecuador and Bolivia.  They're also grown a bit in other areas with hot enough environments, like California, Australia, New Zealand, Spain, Israel, and Kenya.  They don't travel very well, so they're not as popular world wide.  Their domestication is a mystery, other than their birth area.  They're also not found growing in the wild.
     The pepino is sometimes classified as a "super fruit," as it has significant amounts of Vitamins C, K, A, and B, as well as protein, iron, fiber, and potassium.  It's also alleged to help battle liver disease and strokes, and aid in stamina and cardiovascular health.  But, as usual, these affects haven't been conclusively proven.  (Incidentally, I'm getting tired of writing this--for a change, I'd like to post about an exotic that has definite, scientifically proven medical benefits.)
     The most common way to eat a pepino is raw, cut open, and scooped out with a spoon.  Occasionally folks cook them up with honey, or sugar.  Although the whole thing is edible, most people don't eat the skin, as it's tough and unpalatable.  So mostly it's the pulp and seeds that are consumed.
     The one I got was about fist sized--about 4 inches (about 10 cm.) long, about 3 inches (about 7.5 cm.) wide, with a tear drop shape.  The outer rind was greenish/whitish/yellowish, with purple racing stripes running down it.  I did the normal method, and just cut it open and had at it.  The interior pulp was yellowish-orange, with a cavity for the seeds.  The texture reminded me of melons.  The taste was reminiscent of a honeydew melon.  Only weaker--the flavor was extremely bland.  I didn't detect any cucumber-like hints.  Overall, it didn't taste bad, but it didn't seem worth the $3.99 I paid for it.  I'm glad I got to try this somewhat rare fruit, but it wasn't very impressive.

Saturday, January 28, 2017

Exotic/Disgusting Foods and Beverages Forum--Taco Bell's Affront to the Almighty

     Ha!  I'm just being dramatic, of course.  I'm referring to Taco Bell's newest creation, that was just rolled out nationwide (in the U.S.) two days ago--the Naked Chicken Chalupa.  Big deal, you may be saying, another chalupa--who cares?  Well, this one is quite different.  Instead of a flour or corn-based outer shell, this one consists of pressed fried chicken.  Or, essentially, the Taco Bell version of KFC's Double Down sandwich, which I discussed in detail in my May 8, 2014 post.
     Unlike KFC, though, I've always liked Taco Bell, albeit in a "guilty pleasure" sort of way.  It started back in my high school days, when my friends and I would drive to the nearby one during lunch period (which was kind of tight, time-wise, as our school periods were only 42.5 minutes long).  Up through the present, Taco Bell and the harder to find White Castle are my favorite fast food joints.  I realize that Taco Bell, like most fast food places, utilize cheap, low-grade food.  The 2000 GMO corn recall, and the furor over the "pink slime" beef in 2012 are just two examples of this, shall we say, relaxed attitude to using the highest quality ingredients.  I further realize that Taco Bell is a perverted, American-ized approximation of authentic Mexican food.  (The restaurant chain has opened up stores in Mexico on two occasions, but both closed down quickly, due to lack of sales.  Evidently, and reasonably, Mexicans weren't big fans of consuming a watered-down, inauthentic copy of their traditional cuisine.)  But, even with these sins admitted, I still enjoy it.  I guess it's a cultural example of me being an ugly American.  So my friends and I jokingly referred to it as "Taco Smell" and "Taco Hell," but many of us were still regular customers.
     Taco Bell was started by a man named, of all things, Glen Bell.  Bell started off with a hot dog stand, then expanded into a hamburger and hot dog stand, and finally switched to a taco stand.  As he grew more successful, he opened up restaurants, called Taco Tias, then El Taco, then Taco Bell in the early 1960's.  Bell sold the chain to PepsiCo in 1978, for over 120 million dollars.  It's become a giant chain, with franchises around the world.
     But back to the focus of this piece.  I picked up my Naked Chicken Chalupa at around lunch time on its opening day.  Structurally it looked like a taco, although it came with a cardboard stand to help keep its innards contained.  Inside the fried chicken "shell" was lettuce, onions, tomatoes, shredded cheese, and an avocado sauce.  As so frequently happens when I make fun of a food beforehand, the result was very good.  I can't say it tasted like a regular taco or chalupa, but its distinct flavor was still impressive.  I finished it eagerly, and I think I will buy this again.  Keep in mind though, this product is listed as being available for a limited time.  So, as with the Double Down, laugh at it if you want, but the weird mutant food item was a pleasing dining experience.  (I was amused, but not very surprised to learn that the authentic Mexican chalupa, named after a type of boat, is very different from what Taco Bell calls a chalupa.)
     Finally, Taco Bell had an advertising campaign that has the odd distinction of being popular, but which resulted in lower (or at least not markedly increased) sales, much like the Energizer Battery Bunny commercials.  The Taco Bell chihuahua, who appeared in many ads saying, "Yo quiero Taco Bell!" ("I want Taco Bell" in Spanish) in the late 1990's/early 2000's, received a lot of attention, and acclaim.  However, sales actually decreased afterwards.  Advertising experts postulated that people may have thought that the dog was cute, and funny, but they may have then associated Taco Bell's products with dog food, which wasn't that appetizing!  (On a sad note, that dog from the commercials, Gidget, passed away in 2009.)
     Oh, and reportedly KFC is currently selling another unholy chicken abomination in the Far East, called a Chizza.  This is a "pizza" which is sauce, cheese, and toppings on a "dough" made of fried chicken.  I can't wait to try this one.

Sunday, January 22, 2017

TPC Day!

     Today EMP Publishing is running an event for their recently released anthology, "The Prison Compendium."  Part of this is a charity drive for donating books to various prisons around the country.  Here's the address for more info about that:
      And here's another for updates about the funding:
     Moving on, one of my co-authors for "The Prison Compendium," Gregory L. Norris, has a fun post on his blog today.  In it, many of the authors for this anthology discuss the back stories for their contributions to "The Prison Compendium."  You can find that at:
     Meanwhile, our anthology is climbing the charts.  The last time I checked it was selling well, and had received four 5-star reviews on Amazon.  Let's hope there are many more sales and satisfied readers.
     You can pick up a copy for yourself at Amazon (, or over at the EMP website:
     I'll close by including the covers, and the author list once more, below.

TOC (story ordering not set)
  1.  "A Ray of Hope" by Paul Stansfield
  2.  "The Joint" (a poetry collection) by Randy D. Rubin
  3.  "Finding the Answer" by Travis Richardson
  4.  "It's a Kinda Magic" by Jeremy Mays
  5.  "Swing a Sparrow on a String" by Ken Goldman
  6.  "The Life and Multiple Deaths of Virgil Eugene" by Jennifer Word
  7.  "Jeremy Knox" by Jeffrey K. Blevins
  8.  "Responsibility" by A. R. Shannon
  9.  "The Will to Lose" by Laird Long
  10. "Parole Violator" by Laird Long
  11.  "Solitary Man" by Adrian Ludens
  12.  "End a Days" by Kristin Dearborn
​  13.  "Just a Spoonful of Horror" by Gary Ives
  14.  "Penalty for Misuse - $20" by J. J. Steinfeld
  15.  "The True Vocation of Sandy Brylirn" by J. J. Steinfeld
  16.  "A Rose is a Rose?" by Larry Lefkowitz
  17.  "Mistress of Light and Dark" by Catherine MacKenzie
  18.  "Unlife Sentence" by Eric J. Juneau
  19.  "The Flea Jar" by Layla Cummins
  20.  "The Side Job" by Joseph B. Cleary
  21.  "In the Jailhouse" by Bruce Harris
  22.  "Impala" by Timothy O'Leary
  23.  "Second Chance" by Tom Larsen
  24.  "Return to Death Row" by Fredrick Obermeyer
  25.  "Smaller" by James A. Miller
  26.  "A Farewell to Apotheosis" by Gregory L. Norris
  27.  "Brooms" by Jon Michael Kelley
  28.  "Seven Conversations in Locked Rooms" by Alex Shvartsman
  29.  "Prisoner Reincarnated" by Calvin Demmer
​  30.  "Innocence USA" by David Rachels
  31.  "Misconceptions" by Bryan Grafton
  32.  "Redemption" by Lee Duffy

  33.  "Monroe and Warner" by Morgen Knight

Friday, January 20, 2017

Exotic/Disgusting Foods and Beverages Forum--Australian Liquorice

     Throughout my life, I've been rather indifferent to licorice (or liquorice, depending on what country you're from).  I didn't really dislike it, exactly, but I also didn't seek it out, or buy it much.  There were always better candies to get, such as ones which were made out of chocolate, or those composed largely of peanut butter, or caramel, etc.  So when I saw a type of licorice from Australia, from the Darrell Lea company, I wasn't dazzled.  I decided to give it a try, but mostly for this blog, rather than out of genuine interest.  (Perhaps paradoxically, I do like absinthe (see November 18, 2015 post), which is made with the licorice-like anise flavor, but this is the exception that proves the rule, I suppose.)
     The Darrell Lea company is fairly old, dating back to 1927.  Their website tells a rags to riches story:  first sold out of a pushcart, then made in a small factory located under the first arch of the iconic Sydney Harbour Bridge, and then into the large conglomerate that they are today.  The company boasts that it's 100% Australian owned, and that its liquorice is free of GMO's, trans fats, preservatives, sweeteners, and high fructose corn syrup.  Also it's low in fat and salt.  And their liquorice is kosher and vegetarian-appropriate.  Darrell Lea's main products are liquorice stix (liquorice pieces with mango or strawberry/white chocolate filling), a "traditional liquorice mix," and several kinds of "soft eating licorice"--pineapple, green apple, mango, blueberry and pomegranate, original, and strawberry.  (I was rather amused by the "soft eating liquorice" title--does that imply that there is "cleaning liquorice," or "vermin-killing liquorice," or "mathematical liquorice"?)  Currently the company's products are available in the U.K., U.S., Canada, South Africa, New Zealand, Belgium, Denmark, and The Netherlands.  Here in the States many stores stock them, from the chain groceries like Whole Foods, Trader Joes, Publix, ShopRite, and Giant Eagle, to stores like Target, Rite Aid, Marshalls, and TJ Maxx.  Some of those I thought were clothing stores, so I don't know what is going on there.
    Liquorice itself has been a popular food item for thousands of years.  It was enjoyed in ancient Greece, it can be found in ancient Egyptian tombs, and has been used in traditional Chinese medicine for at least 3000 years.  The plant prefers a hot climate, so it grows in Southern Europe, Central Asia, Australia, and the Middle East.  Liquorice is billed as being 50 times sweeter than sugar.  And although its taste is very similar, it's not related to anise or fennel.  Folks in France and Spain sometimes dig up the root, clean it off, and chew on it as a natural, refreshing snack.
     Healthwise licorice appears to be a mixed bag.  Some maintain it's useful in combatting hepatitis,certain kinds of dermatitis, hyperlipidaemia, hyperpigmentation, and dental caries.  However, these claims haven't been proven scientifically.  On the other hand, some health detriments have been identified.  The U.S. FDA strongly urges consumers not to eat more than 70-150 grams (2.5- 5.3 ounces) daily, lest they develop edema, hypokalemia, weigh loss/gain, or hypertension.  So I guess licorice is something that should be an occasional treat rather than a regular part of one's diet.
     Anyway, I was able to buy the original flavor, and the strawberry kind, at Wegman's.  Both came in rod-shaped pieces, rather than the long stringy "ropes" that are traditional in U.S. licorice.  The rods were about 5 cm. long (or about 2 inches) and about 1 cm. (or about half an inch) wide.  The original flavor pieces were jet black, while the strawberry ones were bright red.  The taste for both was surprisingly impressive.  Richer and fuller than I expected.  Much better than the common U.S. Twizzlers.  (I haven't sampled the U.S. West Coast-based Red Vines, so I can't comment on them as a comparison.)  For the first time I really enjoyed a licorice candy.  I'll look for these again, and seek out their alternate flavors too.  The website and bag label boast that their liquorice secret is that they gently cook it to seal in moisture, and then they "add in a good dose of Australian magic."  So even if the latter is ground up wombats or something, the results are very good.  If you like licorice, or even if you're mostly ambivalent about it like I am normally, you might want to give the Darrell Lea's liquorice a try.
     One final odd tidbit--evidently over 60% of the liquorice harvested every year goes to flavoring cigarettes and other smoked/chewed tobacco products.