A month or two ago I got a blast from the past. In the beer/alcohol section of the Food Lion supermarket somewhere in North Carolina (I can't remember exactly which town) I saw some Zima. After laughing a bit to myself, I was gripped with the urge to revisit this 1990's phenomenon. But, alas, they were only selling it in 6 packs, and I wasn't that curious, or oddly nostalgic, so I didn't buy any. But, the other day, I saw it again, here in Vermont. And this time it was available in single bottles, in the make-your-own-6-pack section at the local Shaws grocery. So this time a bottle of it came home with me.
I'm guessing younger readers might not remember Zima, so I'll include a slightly more extensive backstory than usual. In the early 1990's, for reasons that have never been satisfactorily explained, the U.S. experienced a "clear craze" for beverages. Tab Clear, Crystal Pepsi, and Miller Clear Beer are just a few examples of this. Also, beer companies were looking to horn in on the wine cooler market by creating a non-beer alcoholic beverage of their own. One of these, Coors, put out a "malternative" beverage, as they're sometimes known, in 1993. The Zima name was taken from the word for "winter" in some Slavic language. (I know that's vague, but I couldn't learn what particular Slavic language, or sub-dialect it's actually from. Any information from Slavic language speakers would be appreciated.) Coors was quite generous with their marketing budget for this new drink, as $50,000,000 was spent in the first year. And, initially it was very successful. Nearly half of all American beer/wine/liquor drinkers reportedly tried Zima at least once. Sales were brisk, and in 1994 Zima sold over 1.4 million barrels, a decidedly respectable total. Alas for Zima, though, something was happening. Some of the beverage's biggest fans were young women rather than men. And since men were seen as (and at that point were) the more enticing, lucrative marketing demographic, this wasn't a positive situation. Comedians like David Letterman perpetuated this idea, that Zima was....girly. Coors started to panic. In 1995 they introduced a Zima Gold flavor, which was amber colored and designed to taste like bourbon, to try to woo back male drinkers. This failed miserably, not even lasting a year. Commercials for Zima were geared heavily towards men, often incorporating sporting themes. This didn't work either--sales continued to plummet, to an average of 600,000 barrels a year in the late 1990's. Which wasn't that great, but not terrible, either. Much to my surprise (I'd forgotten all about it by this time) Zima kept on chugging along, selling its mediocre but still profitable amounts. New flavors were also introduced, like tangerine, citrus, pineapple, green apple, and blackberry. It achieved some success as a light summer beverage, but by now it was firmly equated in the public eye as a drink for women. Coors was even accused of intentionally marketing it to high school students (who in the U.S. are below the legal drinking age), helped by (incorrect) rumors that students could drink Zima and get away with it, since it wouldn't show up on breathalyzers.
But what finally killed Zima was labels, and taxes. Utah changed its rules so that bottles had to mark their alcohol content percentage in large letters. California announced that malternatives like Zima would begin to be taxed as spirits, rather than as a beer. Both of these were cost prohibitive, so Zima was axed in 2008. And although surely some drinkers were disappointed, there wasn't any rioting in the streets or anything. An articles from 2008 noted that a petition demanding a return of Zima attracted only 53 names, a tad short of the 1,000,000 they wanted. (There was one major exception to this--Zima was still sold in Japan after 2008, and still currently is.) However, in time for the 4th of July in 2017, MillerCoors decided to bring Zima back, on a limited basis. (I obviously completely missed this.) It sold well enough for them to try it again in 2018. So that's where we are today.
Back in 1993 or 1994 my friends and I were not immune to the Zima advertising campaign. I vaguely recall trying it, and thinking that it tasted something like 7UP, or Sprite, only a bit watered down. So, not horrifically terrible, but not very good, either. I don't consider myself a macho, "man's man" kind of guy at all, but in this case my reputation was safe, as I went back to drinking beer and some liquors that I actually enjoyed. (And in the past 10-15 years or so this has blossomed into beer snobbery, as even semi-regular readers will probably recall.)
But here's what I thought in 2018. My new bottle read "refreshing citrus beverage," but I think it's still the regular, original flavor. The color of it was clear, and there wasn't much of a detectable odor, either. And my second time drinking Zima, after 24-25 years, resulted in me thinking it was....kind of like weak 7UP or Sprite. It wasn't a drain pour or anything, and it wasn't excruciating like say, Cave Creek Chili Beer (see May 20, 2012 post), but it was far from tasty, too. It was rather like a light beer (Zing! I never get tired of criticizing one of the most popular of "beers," quotation marks to signal my disdain for it). I have no plans to have it again. Maybe in another 24-25 years if I'm feeling nostalgic again.
Therefore, if you're one of the few folks who liked Zima before, here's your chance to have it again. The website for it has a "Z 2K" jokey theme to it, encouraging customers to stock up on it before it's discontinued yet again. I do like the name of a Zima based cocktail I just learned about--Nox-Zima, which is our beverage of note mixed with schnapps. And I suppose if you're a guy, and a stereotypical "bro" type meathead mocks you for being effete, or girly, for drinking it, you can point out that Zima has a higher alcohol content (5%) than most light beers (which run from 2.4% to an average of about 4.2%), so who's the bigger wuss? Answer--you both are! (Sorry, I couldn't resist one more jibe at light beer's expense.)
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